Álvaro Bilbao: Three things about your children's brains that will help you give them all your confidence

El neuropsicólogo Álvaro Bilbao apuesta por educar a nuestro hijo para que confíe en sí mismo, una capacidad que sin duda le ayudará a ir mejor por la vida. Y para conseguir este noble objetivo, Álvaro nos recuerda tres cosas. Primera, afirma que es un peligro contar mentirijillas a nuestros hijos para llevarlos por donde queremos, porque al hacerlo “se activa la ínsula, encargada, por ejemplo, de rechazar alimentos en mal estado”. Con este tipo de mentiras, “esa confianza se va desgastando”, así que, concluye, “mi recomendación es que no mientas a tus hijos”.

Another thing that Álvaro tells us is that “when we give negative messages, that information is burned into the hippocampus, where we store all the information about ourselves and the world, like if you put your finger in boiling water you will burn down". If we give them negative messages, such as “you never try too hard”, “the brain stores the negative messages and incorporates them into their knowledge about the world and about themselves. And he won't be able to put his finger on the task that's difficult, because he knows he never tries hard enough." Negative messages force our son to "act according to what his brain says is happening in the world" , so Álvaro's recommendation is that we give many positive messages and minimize the negatives.

If we want to prepare a child for life, we should be very careful about overprotecting him. And this is how Álvaro explains it, traveling through the brain again: “When a child faces a difficult situation, two important brain structures will be activated: the amygdala (an alarm that indicates dangerous situations) and the prefrontal cortex (which is active when faced with a challenge). Fear and courage coexist. But, “when you solve a problem for him, that part that faces the dangers is deactivated and the only part that remains activated is the amygdala. You are teaching your child that he is not capable and that in a dangerous situation he should feel fear because he has not trained the structure of the brain that will allow him to face things successfully” . Álvaro asks us not to overprotect our children and that "if they make a mistake, don't worry because they will learn from their mistakes."